I Think I'm Onto Something

I've shared this idea for a little while, and everyone sort of chuckles at me. I think the truth is that deep down inside, they're just jealous that they aren't as brilliant as me. The idea? Well, here it is...the long-winded version...well, I guess it's long-winded.

Anyone who has ever had children knows that the laundry seems endless. I could honestly do four loads of laundry a day and STILL never find the bottom of the laundry pile. It's like my laundry read the Bible and decided that it needs to multiply and replenish the laundry room. And, do you know what's the worst thing about laundry? You're NEVER done! At the end of the day, you get undressed and there in the basket is more stupid laundry to wash.

My solution is brilliant, I think, and environmentally friendly. Naked weekends. Yep, you heard me. Naked. Without Clothing. Not even a loin cloth because that would have to be washed. Maybe a fig leaf, but I'm not sure where to get those. Of course, plucking leaves from trees isn't environmentally friendly, so I guess that'd be out too.

Honestly, people. Let's think about this suggestion. If everyone went naked for the whole weekend, wives and mothers everywhere could finally catch up on the laundry. And just think of how much less they'd have to do. Plus the time we'd save in general everyday living would be incredible. Ever tally up how much time it takes to unbutton those pants before going to the bathroom? And then pull them back up? For a pregnant woman, it's even more time. I'm just sayin'...

Yes, I know it would seem a little awkward at first. I'm sure a few people would feel strange at church with a naked preacher, but if we're ALL doing it, then it would just be...well...um...it'd eventually just be the norm. Think of how liberating it could be, too! Women wouldn't have to wear panty hose or uncomfortable skirts that ride up. Men wouldn't need those tight shirts with ties around their necks. And no one would have a butt snuggy all weekend long!!!

Seriously, people! This is a stroke of genius that I'm onto. Maybe I should call my local politicians and see what I can do about making it law. President Elect Obama seems like a fairly open-minded guy. I should call him. Or maybe not. I wouldn't want him to think I'm too brilliant and offer me a job as a cabinet officer or anything. I'm content just being a mom for now.

All in favor? What? Why am I only hearing crickets out there? You people KNOW you think this is a brilliant plan. Just admit it. *sigh* I guess I'll go do yet another load of laundry while I wait for you people. While I'm at it, I might go get some sunless tanner for when this idea really starts to catch on.